Mahatmama

ever fall in love with someone you shouldn't fall in love with?

5.14.2004

i think i have not posted for so long anywhere because i do not feel like i have anything coherant to say. my thoughts scatter the older i get. not that i am that old in a general sense. but the farther away from school i get, the worse it is to organize what i think/say. my convictions come from thinking initially, but after i think, i feel, and when i have to reiterate whatever i thought, i cannot, but only feel whatever decision i came to.

i want to write. not like a writer like "hey, read my book, my poem, my article" but i want to write papers again. i want to do reports. i want to be told a subject to write about and write about it. i want deadlines. i want specifications. length, topic, etc. and not about terrible things. about interesting things. about things that i need to learn more about.

so. if anyone ever actually comes to this blog anymore, please give me some help here. i know i am quite capable of setting these standards myself, but i'd rather have someone else do some of it.